Abel to Yzerman
I told Tommy, our Dive apologist and defender of transvestites, this morning that the key to finding a solution to a particularly troublesome problem is admitting the problem in the first place. It’s just such advice that has hockey fans from all corners seeking me out for guidance. I’m not bragging. Just, you know, keeping it real.
So, you can imagine just how stunned I was this evening to see that, along with Tommy, the Wings are following my sage advice.
Just when you’ve recovered from the last riveting “Wings Scouting Report” Ansar Khan(!) punches you in the face with another one. Today….Nik Kronwall. Check out some of these outlandish statements:
“The hard-luck defenseman has sustained a significant injury in each of his three NHL seasons (he broke his leg in 2004 and tore a knee ligament in 2005).”
“Kronwall will need a new defense partner after Mathieu Schneider signed with Anaheim. He’s never played with Nicklas Lidstrom for any length of time.”
“The Wings have no doubt Kronwall will be an impact player. It’s why they locked him up to a five-year, $15 million contract extension last season. He’s going to be a top-four defenseman in Detroit for years to come.”
Outside the box. Daring. Courageous. Khan(!).
Christy Hammond, founder of Behind The Jersey, has continued her disturbing trend of making the rest of us Wing bloggers look like fire watchers.
Her latest? This.
Probably the best Steve Yzerman resource in existence, and it’s like twenty minutes old.
Another day, another contestant in the “Please, Will Someone For The Love Of Sweet Baby Jesus, Find A Replacement For ‘Fire On Ice’” campaign. John, an A2Y reader from glorious Saginaw, has decided that an elderly roster could very well finally come to be an advantage for the Wings PR Geniuses.
You read between the lines a bit yesterday. You studied Helene St. James’ blog entry, Forsberg to Wings? and you looked for any kind of subtle hint that she actually had a source with an inside track to Floppa’s line of thinking. Most of you have already figured this out, but I’m going to give you a little hint.
The most important line of that entire post was the one at the top, just below the headline: July 29, 2007
In the middle of the summer, with zero Wing news to note, St. James tapped out a few sentences, threw the Holland/Baizley reference in there, and the Free Press generated a couple hundred thousand hits. A few speculative and not particularly earth shattering paragraphs about why the Wings would consider it, all the same discussions you’ve read on every Wing blog and message board, then the only part that matters:
4. Why it won’t happen
First, there is a possibility Forsberg will decide to spend a year playing in Sweden.
Second, there’s the Colorado Avalanche factor. The franchise for which Forsberg played for nine seasons has $44 million committed, which gives them about the same cap space as the Wings. Given the upgrades made in signing Ryan Smyth and Scott Hannan, as well as the steady presence of Joe Sakic, the Avs look like playoff contenders again and surely would be attractive to Forsberg.
Stand by for consistency. I’m keeping up with the Sports Blog of the Week thing. This weekend, I offer you a variety of selections then get down to business with the blog of choice. Found a few interesting ones I liked but haven’t selected for some different reasons.
The “Replace the Pathetic Fire On Ice Marketing Disaster With Something Not Designed By a 6 Year Old” contest is picking up steam. A2Y expatriot TeamDub has returned with a vengeance and a graphic all Detroit fans can relate to.
Arizona has been heard from. Aaron, an A2Y reader from Phoenix and varsity Photoshop user, has provided us our fourth entry in the “Replace Fire On Ice Because It’s Juvenile, Hastily Designed and Just Plain Sucks” contest. A reminder: whoever the 8 dedicated A2Y readers determine has crafted the best graphic/slogan for the upcoming season will win a fantastic prize and an honor that is almost indescribably unique (their graphic will be prominently displayed on the A2Y front page the entire season).
Aaron’s a smart dude. He knows what causes us pain and has woven it into his graphic and his slogan. Nothing causes a family more stress than #39 be-bopping outside his crease.
I’m not sure how fond I am of the deep diggers just jumping into the summer fray, offering analysis, after months of inactivity. I question the motivation a bit. So, when the Freep’s George Sipple comes out of nowhere and decides to blog a bit about Dustin Penner of all people…I begin to feel clammy and a little scared.
Sure, the Wings could use a 29-goal scorer like Penner (6-foot-4, 243 pounds). But it’s a big commitment to make for a guy that doesn’t always seem to play each shift as if it were his last.
Good point. The Wings are a team who have stood their ground in that regard. I can’t recall a single transaction that included shelling out big bucks for a player who doesn’t bring it every shift.
Oh…Robert Lang. Nevermind.
Our boy Ansar digs even deeper than we thought possible as he provides yet another gripping “Red Wing Scouting Report.” Today, the junior Enigma himself.
An Edmonton scout implored the Oilers to select Jiri Hudler with one of the club’s three second-round picks in the 2002 entry draft. When they went against his wishes, it prompted him to remark, “Now Detroit will probably take him.’‘
He was right. When it comes to skilled Europeans, the Wings are not deterred by size.
Insightful. Perceptive. Original. Khan(!).
About Abel to Yzerman
Welcome to Abel to Yzerman, a Red Wing blog since 1977. No other site on the internet has better-researched, fact-laden and better prepared discussions than A2Y. Re-phrase: we do little research, find facts and stats highly overrated and claim little to no preparation. There are 19 readers of A2Y. No more, no less. All of them, except maybe one, are juvenile in nature. Reminding them of that in the comment section will only encourage them to prove that. Your suggestions and critiques are welcome: email@example.com